2nd Monthiversary

The time has really been flying by quickly. As of today, I've already been here for 2 months and it's really hard to believe. I'm still experiencing new things, seeing new places, meeting new people, and just really enjoying life as it's happening. I don't find myself in a hurry these days and that's quite a nice feeling. I feel like I used to always be in a rush and usually for no good reason. Life itself is taking it's time here and I'm more able to enjoy what happens as it happens. This is something I think everyone should strive for. Yes, in the recent past, I've been pretty stressed out about certain things, but for the most part, I'm pretty mellow. Not letting yourself feel pressured is a great way to stay positive. 

Seriously, I can't believe I've been here for 2 whole months already! But honestly, it feels like longer, yet not so long at the same time. Does that make sense? I think it feels longer because I'm settled in completely and not so long because I'm enjoying everything. Yeah, that makes sense. To me, at least. BTDubs, I hit eating right hardcore yesterday. I even had a really good run. I'm super sore today and wheezing a little, NBD. I'll go run again today. I've been using the elliptical occasionally, but that just doesn't compare to the running shoes hitting the pavement. It's not as good a work out and I just enjoy running and am less bored by it. I'm doing better eating healthier options and sticking to my plans. Yes, I still slip up. Yes, I still struggle daily. Yes, I end up going to sleep wishing I hadn't eaten something that I shouldn't have. But that's the nature of weight loss issues. It happens to everyone in my position, no matter what they tell you.

I weighed myself today for the first time in probably over a month. I was shocked to find that it wasn't nearly as bad as I was anticipating. I was legit expecting to see that I'd gained 15 pounds back, but to my pleasant surprise, it was only about 8 1/2. That's a relief. But it's sad that it's a relief. I should NOT be relieved about an 8 pound weight gain. But it's better than how I feel about how I look. It's come back to that complacency issue. Because I've been at the same size and now with the concrete knowledge of a regain, I feel gross. I feel fat. I truly feel like I've gained 20 pounds back. Until I begin to lose again and see a physically visible difference, I won't be happy with what's going on. Now that I do have that concrete knowledge, I've kind of been slapped back into reality and I feel more motivated now with a way to think about a plan of attack. Ugh. I'm so tired of this. It's so not worth it to get off track.

Sorry I'm not really keeping up with posting lately. Actually, no I'm not really sorry. I'm busy. I do miss writing more often, but I'm doing what I can. Of course, I know people from home are using this blog as a way to keep up with my new life, and I promise I'll do better. Well, I kind of promise. Ok, I'll do what I can.